CPR 1-24-2013 LADY EMMA GETS SWORN IN AS NATIONAL HEAD PET

 

There have been no Pet Reports this week because of the extensive preparations 
that have been underway for the Inauguration of Lady Emma as NATIONAL HEAD PET.  
Lady has asked the Pet Press not to refer to her as NATIONAL HEAD PET, but 
instead refer to her as "THE FIRST LADY".  When it was pointed out that it is 
usually  the spouse of the Executive  that gets referred to as First Lady, and 
not the Executive, Lady characterized the reference as "archaic" and "an 
unfortunate linguistic remnant of the pawtriarchialism that for centuries has 
prevented female dogs from assuming positions of prominence and power." However,  
Lady was not so hung up on reversing traditional male-female dog dynamics when 
it came to accepting from her former well heeled adversary, Mutt Romney, mutti 
millionaire capitalist, an expensive, diamond encrusted collar to wear to the 
Inaugural. (Photo 1)  Lady Iin fact proudly wore the collar to the actual 
Inauguration Ceremony, where she placed her paw on a bible (Photo 2) and pledged 
to lick the problems (Photo 3) plaguing the Pet Nation.  
 
TOMORROW:  PHOTOS OF LADY AND HEDGIE TRIPPING THE LIGHT FANTASTIC AT THE GALA 
INAUGURAL HEAD PET BALL! 
SPONSORED BY PUPSI COLA, OFFICIAL SOFT DRINK OF GALA INAUGURAL HEAD PET BALL!